Back to school today. I always get nervous. I always tell myself not to. I always laugh later at how silly I was to be nervous about the first day; the kids are cowed and sleepy. Still, one corrective teaching interaction is one more than usual on day one. And no growth year kids until tomorrow. Still, first day of school is under my belt. Let the craziness commence.
Dogsitting is over. Thank goodness. In theory, I love dogs. In practice, they are too energetic, too dependent and too messy for me. Still it wasn't so bad and the pay was great. Plus, the house was fun to live in for a week. So, there's that.
My folks are coming to visit in a month. I haven't seen them since July and I'm excited. My dad's coming to school with me one day. I think that will be fun.
My apartment no longer feels like home. That's strange for me. New roommate in ten days. Maybe that will help.
Time for assembly; happy Monday!
Monday, August 27, 2007
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
This and that and then some
Hello! Sorry for not posting in nearly a month. I have no excuse other than to say that I really did not have much to post about. And even now that I do have a lot to post about, I'm posting more to let you know I'm alive than anything else. So, let's get going, eh?
I got back from LA safe and sound. I learned on my flight back that there is an acceptable amount of fuel leakage on transcontinental flights. For the record, it is much higher than I was comfortable with, but those airplane mechanics must know more than I bc we made it back in one piece.
The first week back I made up for all the sleep I'd missed out on in the past year. I would wake up just enough to say good bye to Brian as he left for work and then I would roll back over and sleep for another couple of hours. It was pure bliss. Again, didn't do much. Read a few books (still not HP, so don't ruin it for me!), bummed around Annapolis/DC/etc, caught up on the Food Network, indulged in Restaurant Week - you know, important things.
My apartment had been powerwashed and repainted while I was away so I came back to a shiny new building and a dirty, bug-infested bedroom (since my room faces the street, all the crap from the building got pushed in via the powerwashing). I spent the better part of the first week back getting my management company to take care of it. And even though I have not spent a single night in the apartment since I returned from my seminar, victory has never tasted so sweet.
The administration at my school changed while I was away. This was something I knew was happening, but I still came back to a handful of surprises which included a new schedule (I was slated to teach ninth grade world history instead of seventh grade Civics) and a new classroom (I was moved out of the classroom I have had for my entire three years and into a shared rooming situation, which requires me to teach my four classes in three different rooms). I was able to reinstate my schedule as it was set before I left for California (same as the past three years), but it was an endeavor that left me not feeling so great about the start of the year. As the year gets under way (we are just over halfway through 2 weeks of training), I am struggling with how to interact with the new administration, how to re-establish myself as a leader, how to figure out when to fight the system and when to just let things be. I know this will be a meaningful learning experience for me, but I am hoping that it can also be a positive one.
My roles for the upcoming school year? Teach three courses each semester, continue as a behavior management coach, continue to mentor and co-plan with the "new" Civics teacher, oversee the implementation of interim assessments in the social studies department, and facilitate/lead the middle school academic team. Oh, and I have been asked to coach debate, although the jury is still out on that one.
This week marks six months since Brian and I first went out and I continue to shake my head at how normal and adult of a relationship it is. Really, things are so great. You have to remember kids, this is me we're talking about. I'm not sure I can remember the last time I was in a relationship that wasn't plagued by some kind of drama (whether internal or external). The ease of it all, the comfort and all of the great things that come with being with him is something that makes me pretty damn pleased. Since coming back from California, there have been a lot of changes to deal with and even still I realize that not only am I content living out here and happy with my life as it is now, but that I cannot imagine wanting any other life at the moment. And that I think I'd like to keep this going for a good long while. It was startling for me bc this life is not really quite what or where I'd pictured, but, no matter how stressed and overwhelmed I am by work at the moment, overall I'm happy and that's more than enough right now.
Now...back to unit planning.
I got back from LA safe and sound. I learned on my flight back that there is an acceptable amount of fuel leakage on transcontinental flights. For the record, it is much higher than I was comfortable with, but those airplane mechanics must know more than I bc we made it back in one piece.
The first week back I made up for all the sleep I'd missed out on in the past year. I would wake up just enough to say good bye to Brian as he left for work and then I would roll back over and sleep for another couple of hours. It was pure bliss. Again, didn't do much. Read a few books (still not HP, so don't ruin it for me!), bummed around Annapolis/DC/etc, caught up on the Food Network, indulged in Restaurant Week - you know, important things.
My apartment had been powerwashed and repainted while I was away so I came back to a shiny new building and a dirty, bug-infested bedroom (since my room faces the street, all the crap from the building got pushed in via the powerwashing). I spent the better part of the first week back getting my management company to take care of it. And even though I have not spent a single night in the apartment since I returned from my seminar, victory has never tasted so sweet.
The administration at my school changed while I was away. This was something I knew was happening, but I still came back to a handful of surprises which included a new schedule (I was slated to teach ninth grade world history instead of seventh grade Civics) and a new classroom (I was moved out of the classroom I have had for my entire three years and into a shared rooming situation, which requires me to teach my four classes in three different rooms). I was able to reinstate my schedule as it was set before I left for California (same as the past three years), but it was an endeavor that left me not feeling so great about the start of the year. As the year gets under way (we are just over halfway through 2 weeks of training), I am struggling with how to interact with the new administration, how to re-establish myself as a leader, how to figure out when to fight the system and when to just let things be. I know this will be a meaningful learning experience for me, but I am hoping that it can also be a positive one.
My roles for the upcoming school year? Teach three courses each semester, continue as a behavior management coach, continue to mentor and co-plan with the "new" Civics teacher, oversee the implementation of interim assessments in the social studies department, and facilitate/lead the middle school academic team. Oh, and I have been asked to coach debate, although the jury is still out on that one.
This week marks six months since Brian and I first went out and I continue to shake my head at how normal and adult of a relationship it is. Really, things are so great. You have to remember kids, this is me we're talking about. I'm not sure I can remember the last time I was in a relationship that wasn't plagued by some kind of drama (whether internal or external). The ease of it all, the comfort and all of the great things that come with being with him is something that makes me pretty damn pleased. Since coming back from California, there have been a lot of changes to deal with and even still I realize that not only am I content living out here and happy with my life as it is now, but that I cannot imagine wanting any other life at the moment. And that I think I'd like to keep this going for a good long while. It was startling for me bc this life is not really quite what or where I'd pictured, but, no matter how stressed and overwhelmed I am by work at the moment, overall I'm happy and that's more than enough right now.
Now...back to unit planning.
Friday, July 27, 2007
Constitutional boot camp: Day Twenty
Except for dinner and a closing breakfast, my National Academy experience is over. Finished. Complete. It ended with a short concluding lecture, which I had trouble focusing on, and a series of small group panel presentations.
My group chose to write a new creedal affirmation for the United States. I was pretty proud of our work - not only the content, but the way in which we completed it. In fact, in the midst of polishing our paper last night I bounced a little on the couch and said, "My inner geek is pretty excited." Of course, one of my group members replied with, "Yeah, we can really tell" (clearly he missed the bounce). The paper is pretty great, if I do say so myself, and the presentation went very well. Our professor and the preceptors (like TAs) applauded us for radically redefining citizenship and for creating an affirmation that allows any member of the community to identify themselves within. We got some pretty solid feedback, which made me proud. I have struggled these three weeks with the thought that I do not actively participate. I don't ask many questions and I don't share my ideas unless they have not already been explained by someone else and I wondered if I was coming across in the wrong light. I was glad for this opportunity to participate more actively without having to pretend to be someone I am not.
I was walking away from the presentation - back to my seat - feeling pretty proud of myself when our professor made eye contact with me. Let me preface this by saying while I didn't always agree with him, I think our professor is one of the most intelligent, thoughtful people I have ever known. Anyway, as I walked past him he reaches up and stops me (he was sitting at the "judges" table) and says something like, "Really good distinction you made during the question and answer period. Very clear and direct. You have a very sharp analysis of complex ideas. Nice work." I think I floated back to my seat. Seriously.
I'm a huge geek. I understand this.
So, the class was amazing. The whole experience was amazing. I'm not sure I could even find the words to describe what it has meant for me to be here. Right now, though, I am focused on getting through dinner, the night (I could barely sleep at all last night) and tomorrow. Just think, after twenty-five days away, I will be home in twenty-seven hours. That is a pretty wonderful feeling.
My group chose to write a new creedal affirmation for the United States. I was pretty proud of our work - not only the content, but the way in which we completed it. In fact, in the midst of polishing our paper last night I bounced a little on the couch and said, "My inner geek is pretty excited." Of course, one of my group members replied with, "Yeah, we can really tell" (clearly he missed the bounce). The paper is pretty great, if I do say so myself, and the presentation went very well. Our professor and the preceptors (like TAs) applauded us for radically redefining citizenship and for creating an affirmation that allows any member of the community to identify themselves within. We got some pretty solid feedback, which made me proud. I have struggled these three weeks with the thought that I do not actively participate. I don't ask many questions and I don't share my ideas unless they have not already been explained by someone else and I wondered if I was coming across in the wrong light. I was glad for this opportunity to participate more actively without having to pretend to be someone I am not.
I was walking away from the presentation - back to my seat - feeling pretty proud of myself when our professor made eye contact with me. Let me preface this by saying while I didn't always agree with him, I think our professor is one of the most intelligent, thoughtful people I have ever known. Anyway, as I walked past him he reaches up and stops me (he was sitting at the "judges" table) and says something like, "Really good distinction you made during the question and answer period. Very clear and direct. You have a very sharp analysis of complex ideas. Nice work." I think I floated back to my seat. Seriously.
I'm a huge geek. I understand this.
So, the class was amazing. The whole experience was amazing. I'm not sure I could even find the words to describe what it has meant for me to be here. Right now, though, I am focused on getting through dinner, the night (I could barely sleep at all last night) and tomorrow. Just think, after twenty-five days away, I will be home in twenty-seven hours. That is a pretty wonderful feeling.
Thursday, July 26, 2007
Things to remember as it all comes to an end
I think these are important for me to keep in mind. The last push is always the hardest...
- The big end-of-seminar group project is more than halfway done.
- For as much as I have been less social than many, I am in this program with some pretty great people - they are intelligent, funny, friendly, helpful and kind.
- Might actually have some down time tonight.
- My boyfriend takes excellent care of me.
- Three days until I am home.
Monday, July 23, 2007
Bah
I am cranky, but I don't even know what I'm so cranky about. I feel overwhelmed, but I don't know what it is that is particularly overwhelming. The seminar is losing its lustre and it shouldn't be. We're talking about interesting theory this week (focusing on constitutional interpretation) and we have a big group project going down in the afternoons, so what is my problem? I hate when this happens, when you're run down and cranky and on the edge for no discernible reason. If I can't rationalize through it, I don't like it. And I don't like this, any of it, one bit.
Why my professor is great: Reason #47
In an explanation of one of the nineteen end-of-seminar paper/hearing topics, he included the following warning: "steer clear of Winston Churchill's thoughtlessly and oft-quoted bromide* about democracy being a very bad form of government, but better than all others - a statement too clever by a factor of minus-two."
Also, as an aside, if my neck goes this week, in addition to my back, I'm giving up and trading this body in for something a little more reliable. Five more nights on the vinyl-covered, foam mattress...I can handle this. I hope.
*a bromide is a trite remark; a cliche
Also, as an aside, if my neck goes this week, in addition to my back, I'm giving up and trading this body in for something a little more reliable. Five more nights on the vinyl-covered, foam mattress...I can handle this. I hope.
*a bromide is a trite remark; a cliche
Saturday, July 21, 2007
Lazy Saturday
As many of you know, a good portion of my adult, post-college life was spent alone. I lived alone in Milwaukee, not knowing anyone. I lived with my folks in Chicago for awhile without really reconnecting with any friends. Even in DC, I spent a lot of time at night and on the weekends, just being by myself. The thing is, I never really disliked this. It would have been easy to change and it's not like I didn't - or don't - have friends I could have easily spent time with. Used to be that I sort of relished the solitary life and, even when it wore on me, I always knew how to be by myself. I'm talking about real solitude - just you and your thoughts. The first weekend here I was a wreck and subsequently things got better, but even still, on some of the nights I have been at a loss for what to do once my reading was done. Had I forgotten how to be alone?
Nah.
This morning, I got up at 8 (having gotten in around 230a), had breakfast, chatted with Laura (my roommate at the Academy) and then, around 10a, went back to bed. Since re-awakening at 1145a, I have had some quality alone time. It seems that everyone from the Academy has vacated for the day and so this part of campus is very quiet. I sat on the bluff for an hour or so, reading The Federalist and staring blankly at the mountains. Then, after eight papers (more than enough for one sitting), I walked around campus and talked with my sister. I stopped at the campus store and the ATM and then I took my thoughts for a walk through the parts of campus I had not yet seen. It was nice to meander down paths with no real destination and mull over a variety of thoughts about my life, the content of this course, etc. And, as I made my way back to the apartment, I realized that I am still quite capable of being alone and enjoying it.
Now I'm excited to curl up in a chair (my back's bothering me so "curl" is probably not quite accurate) with skittles and diet pepsi and watch SWAT on my laptop (it was $5 at the bookstore - no more XMen 3). Then, perhaps I'll tackle the remaining three Federalist papers, before calling Brian, taking a shower and having dinner with Christine - a former SEED teacher who's out this way now. Should be good times.
Nah.
This morning, I got up at 8 (having gotten in around 230a), had breakfast, chatted with Laura (my roommate at the Academy) and then, around 10a, went back to bed. Since re-awakening at 1145a, I have had some quality alone time. It seems that everyone from the Academy has vacated for the day and so this part of campus is very quiet. I sat on the bluff for an hour or so, reading The Federalist and staring blankly at the mountains. Then, after eight papers (more than enough for one sitting), I walked around campus and talked with my sister. I stopped at the campus store and the ATM and then I took my thoughts for a walk through the parts of campus I had not yet seen. It was nice to meander down paths with no real destination and mull over a variety of thoughts about my life, the content of this course, etc. And, as I made my way back to the apartment, I realized that I am still quite capable of being alone and enjoying it.
Now I'm excited to curl up in a chair (my back's bothering me so "curl" is probably not quite accurate) with skittles and diet pepsi and watch SWAT on my laptop (it was $5 at the bookstore - no more XMen 3). Then, perhaps I'll tackle the remaining three Federalist papers, before calling Brian, taking a shower and having dinner with Christine - a former SEED teacher who's out this way now. Should be good times.
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